ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
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