We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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