My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
