it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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