Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
