no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
