in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Is her dick bigger than yours?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize