worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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