If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Sorry my hands just texted you
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
