The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
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