I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize