hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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