I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Randomize
