Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
