I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
