The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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