No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
