PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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