don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
