You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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