I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
