she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
