Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
