I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
