haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
