it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
