Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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