You're my little dorito
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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