I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
