who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
