my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
