You're so nebulous sometimes
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
