Please, let me fuck your mom
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
