I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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