If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
