everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
She bit a glass in half.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
