Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
