you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
