opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
