I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
