I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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