Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
