so let's talk penis.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
