i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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