I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
