Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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