I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
