I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
