Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
