Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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